End of 2018

As 2018 comes to an end, I wanted to share with you a few things.

In 2018, Alec’s case was reopened.  Outside of that one event there has been no progress.  Those that know me, know that I don’t have a problem sharing what I think.  HOWEVER, I am showing real restraint in connecting dots and presenting theories for why this continues to drag on.   Monthly I ask for updates and there still is no end in sight.  I am being cautious to not say or do anything that can be an excuse.

With that said I do believe that the lack or slow action comes from the same place that the original investigation was ruled a suicide and moved on, one person’s crisis does not warrant the same importance from someone else.  I am sure this will be explored in more detail if/when the case is closed again.

I would like to reiterate that there are no misconceptions that there is something that can be said, found, or done that will change the outcome that Alec is gone.   I also know that Alec is forever a part of the fabric of the lives of those that loved him as each of your loved ones are part of yours.

I have neglected posting on this blog because from an investigation perspective nothing has changed and  because I have had to come to terms internally how to move forward.  I have not neglected remembering and loving my son.

For those of you that didn’t know Alec, I would like to share some things.

Alec was a Christian.  He made mistakes but I will challenge anyone to say they are without sin.  There are many “Christians” that said many things  when he was alive but if they were “concerned” more than “judging” and “gossiping” I never saw an outstretched hand.  He had conflicts in school with teachers over his beliefs.  You see he believed that you should stand for what you believe and just because you are in a role of authority, you still have to follow the rules.   We have some wonderful teachers in Nashville but we are lying to ourselves if we think there are not some serious problems also.  This is directly linked to why the disclosure of the investigation and actions will continue.  We may or may not be able to prove what happened that night, but we do know how it was handled and that double standards exist and only by shining a light on it can we change a broken system.

Alec’s heart was huge.  He would make any sacrifice for those in need.  He would help anyone that asked.  He was  so accepting of anyone, especially those that were struggling.  I only wish that my heart was as loving.

Alec was a human.  He struggled and made missteps just as we all do, but he filled our lives with love and laughter.  He would do anything no matter how silly our outrageous to bring a smile to your face if he felt you needed to.

Alec is forever 17, frozen in time and at the same time living a parallel life in my mind.  I have seen him graduate, go to welding school, driving home, wondering where he would be living , did he start his own business,  would  he have started his own family, and missing him .  When we loose someone we love, there is a hole that is forever a part of us just like they are forever a part up until then.  With time, the hole doesn’t heal, but you learn to move forward incomplete.

As the bible says, hold on to what is good and mediate on these things.

You see, this blog is to honor my son and encourage others.

Love and God’s blessings upon you.